Suffer the Little Children (Book Review)

Parents Behind Bars Leave Adolescents Emotionally Scarred
by Adeeba Folami

“Every night, approximately three million children go to bed with a parent in prison or jail,” reads the cover of “What Will Happen to Me?” by Howard Zehr and Lorraine Stutzman Amstutz, (2011, Good Books). The duo wrote the book to shine a spotlight on children of incarcerated parents, youth who are “often forgotten” yet “profoundly affected” when their mother and/or father up behind bars. Zehr and Austutz make the case that the needs of such children rarely are taken into account.

The book points out what is well accepted by those familiar with the American criminal justice system: “that people of color are over represented primarily because of law enforcement and sentencing policies that impact communities of color most heavily.”

The loss of these adults to a period of confinement sentences their offspring to confusion, depression, anger and a condition they – many times – accept as being their own fault. The mix of emotions these children learn to carry like a heavy burden leads them to act out in a number of ways, most commonly seen by their new caregivers/guardians, school teachers, counselors and family therapists.

“What Will Happen to Me?” features photos and comments of children whose lives are, or have been, impacted by the imprisonment of one or more parent. “My life is kinda horrible, kinda bad,” says Patrick, whose father is in prison. “There’s so much to do with him that I haven’t even done yet.”

The book goes on to offer suggestions on how to help affected children deal with their anger, shame and grief, answers 10 questions commonly asked as they attempt to make sense of their dilemma and lists the Bill of Rights developed by the San Francisco Children of Incarcerated Parents specifically for these young people.

The experiences, trials and difficulties faced by their caregivers also are revealed as an example of how it is not only children of incarcerated parents who suffer as a result of criminal acts but the effects also extend to the adult family members of the perpetrators of crime who take over the role of raising these children. “I was so tired getting four kids up everyday, running here and there,” said Jacqueline Finley, a grandmother raising her incarcerated daughter’s children. The senior lost her job and was forced to seek government assistance from her state, although her request for aid was denied. “If I was a mother and these were my kids and I got laid off … they would help me get another job. I’m just their grandmother and they won’t help me.”

Additionally, “What Will Happen to Me?” devotes a section to the concept of “restorative justice,” defined as “a philosophy and practice” that “focuses more on needs and responsibilities and less on “deserts” and punishment.” Such a system of justice takes into account every person and family that suffers a traumatic upheaval as the result of a criminal act, especially the children who must endure the trying experience that in no way was any fault of their own.

As the criminal justice system continues to expand, it is sure that the information and resources found in “What Will Happen to Me?” will prove helpful to any persons or organizations that step in to care for, educate, befriend, mentor or otherwise fill the void left in the lives of children whose parents are taken from them in order to serve a sentence behind bars.

© 2011 – All Rights Reserved – The Black House News
Unlimited online distribution allowed with acknowledgement of bhonline.org as the source

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